i'm so amazed at how things change in what seems like such a short amount of time.
this time last year? we were best friends.
this time last year? we talked everyday. i couldn't bear the thought of losing you.
this time last year? my only concern was finding a dress for the eighth grade dance.
i was so vulnerable, so stupid. i believed anything.
i think things weren't really all that good, i just made them that way in my head, looked past the bad just because i didn't want to see it. that was a good plan, the bad does nothing but depresses me.
i want things to go back, but yet again i don't.
its made me who i am, who i'm going to be. but who i was started it all. a year ago i never thought i'd be this person. that these obstacles would come, that these things would happen, that these friendships would end.
i'm done with being everything i was.
i'm me, NOW.
"i wanna have friends, that love me for the man i've become not the man that i was."
-the avett brothers.
its not that i'm leaving my past behind, i'm just recreating what my future will be like.
i'm sure i make no sense to anyone but myself.
i just want to be loved without question, without backstabbing, without ignoring. thats what i want.
