in my lifetime i will:

slow dance with someone on the beach.
take an epic picture that anyone can appreciate.
get a tan.
be happy.
have a job that makes me legitimately happy.
fix things with you, because the end of our friendship brought me more pain than anything.
you know, more and more every day i realize it was a mutual fault, but to me, i don't think it changes anything.
i will have a stable friendship in my life. i will.

i'm not sure who i am.
or where i'm going.
but i'm getting there.

to be honest, I'm not really sure what's going on on my life right now.
my friends are different daily.
I'm often not sure of why Im doing wrong, and I wish someone would just tell me. there are some people who I can't imagine not in my life who are mad at me fr reasons unknown to me.
but I'm starting to know that I have to be thankful fr what I have. whether it be material things, or friends or whatever else.
I'm adjusting to who I've become. and I hope I haven't changed for the worse. but who I've become, I can honestly say I like her more.
I'm more of a me who doesn't care what others think, I'm doing what I need to do for myself, even if the consequences hurt me.

tech week is this week. it's going to be extremely stressful, but I'm ready. deadly weapons is going to be good. I can feel it (:

things are going decently.
i'm thinking about changing up the old blog layout soon. hmm. not sure.
my computer spazzes out a lot.
i don't think this is normal.
i'm really excited about cheer.
its gonna be an awesome summer, and a good year (:

girl drama.

it makes teenage life spin round.
but all of it is so pointless.
why the heck does it matter If I hang out with your ex-boyfriend? especially if we're just friends.
I'm tired of letting girl drama dominte my life. I try just as hard as I possibly can to avoid it.
it's only 5 months into the year and I've lost a friend. maybe two or three. it's starting to effect me in ways I cannot describe.
I can't stop crying. this is all so familiar.
it needs to be a far off place I can forget.
I can't do this anymore.

I can't remember the last time I was this happy.
I'm so at peace with my life.
everything has settled down, now all that needs to happen is June 10th's arrival.
(:

papers.

i wish i knew what i was writing about, instead, i'll blog.

my computer is doing weird things that is making writing a paper challenging.
i'm obsessed with this song. like whoa.
i wish i could get thoughts together so i could pass this paper.
i don't think our printer is working, this is not good.
honors papers really make me dislike school, not that i already didn't.
i keep thinking there's stuff i have to do, then i forget.
must. write. paper.
must. memorize. lines.
i think that's it for now.

order has been restored in the universe; I'm happyhappyhappyy :D

tiring week.

this week many things occured.
I fixed things with you.
I was really insulted.
I tried out for cheerleading.
I made cheerleading.
I studied my lines, a lot. but Im still really unsure about them.
I've procrastinated on a paper.
i made a new friend or two.
I became more accepting.
I've been happier.
and this my friends, has made my week a good one.
(:

some days... I just thank God you're still around.